Beer is the “meat and potatoes” of the drinking world. Sure there are faster ways to get sh*tfaced, and there are much classier drinks to sip, but since the dawn of alcoholism, beer has been the centerpiece. It is the world’s most widely consumed alcoholic beverage, and the third most popular beverage overall (behind water and tea). The earliest recorded reference to beer is found in ancient Egyptian and Mesopotamian written histories, although historians believe that the first brewskies could have been chugged as early as 9500 BC when barley was first farmed by our Neolithic ancestors.
We all love to grab a pitcher with friends at the bar, or knock a few back during a football game, but there are a surprising amount of amazing foods you can make with it, too. Most of them are easy, cheap, hearty, and sure to be a party favorite. I’ve started out with three of my favorites, but I’ll keep them coming as I get to them and when I run out of other crap to write about:
Who doesn’t love fresh baked bread? Bread goes great with just about everything — even as a side to other beer-made dishes. The greatest part is the the beer takes on the taste of whatever beer you use to make it, so using a Pale Ale will result in a rich, flavorful bread, something like Blue Moon or Budweiser bread will take on a classic beer taste, and Pabst bread will taste like sh*t.
- 3 cups flour (sifted)
- 3 teaspoons baking powder (omit if using Self-Rising Flour)
- 1 teaspoon salt (omit if using Self-Rising Flour)
- 1/4 cup sugar
- 1 (12 ounce) can beer
- 1/2 cup melted butter (1/4 cup will do just fine)
Preheat your oven to 375. Mix up the dry ingredients and pour in the beer. Stir until it becomes a batter, then dump it into a greased bread pan. Pour the melted butter over the top of the batter. I will then dump some sugar on top, but some people grate cheese on top. Both are f*cking delicious. Bake for around an hour or until it looks like bread. You’ll have to let it cool for like 15 minutes before it will cut well, after that just dig in!
Beer Battered Anything
Chicken and (even better) fish taste great with a crispy beer batter. Use the fish in fish tacos on a hot day, or make some fish and chips. As long as you’ve got some way to fry it, beer-battered anything is sure to be a big win.
- 1 cup all-purpose flour
- 2 tablespoons garlic powder
- 2 tablespoons paprika
- 2 teaspoons salt
- 2 teaspoons ground black pepper
- 1 egg, beaten
- 1 (12 fluid ounce) can or bottle beer
Mix up the dry ingredients, then add the egg and stir. Slowly stir in the beer until a thin batter is formed. Then just dip whatever you’re frying into the batter and dump it straight into the fryer.
Cook your sh*t like an Irish mountain man– just smother whatever you’re making in gravy. This Guinness gravy is awesome over fried chicken, a pot roast, some pasties, shepherd’s pie, a thick steak, or some potatoes. It’s super simple and derives most of its flavor from dark, delicious Guinness.
- 2 Big White Onions
- 4 Tablespoons Butter
- 2 Sprigs Fresh Rosemary
- ¼ Cup Flour
- 2 Cans of Guinness (Approximately 4 Cups)
Chop up the onions like a boss — the thinner they are cut the faster they will cook. In a large saucepan, melt the butter over medium heat with the rosemary in it (flavor infusion, bitches), and when you can smell the rosemary and all the butter is gone, add the onions and sautee for around 15 minutes (until the onions are golden brown and caramelized). Sprinkle the flour over the onions and stir for another couple of minutes (this is where it gets tricky because you want to cook it into gravy without burning it). Now pour in the Guinness, and you just cook it while stirring fairly frequently until it thickens up. When it’s cooked, you just remove the rosemary and add salt and pepper to taste — and then put it in a blender, or, if you like the texture (aka you are a man) just use it as is. Pour it on your equally manly meal and enjoy.